Straight Way

I had a sweet evening with the Lord tonight. Gabby and Tony went to church and I stayed home after work to relax, take deep breaths, and attend RWOC online. It felt like ever song they sung, and ever word Apostle spoke was sent straight from God to speak to me. The worship opened up with Kari Jobe's song 'For Me' and immediately the tears began to fall. And I let them. These past few weeks have been so trying on me. Stressed out to the max and confused on which way is up, down, whatever. I even fussed at God, screaming 'Where the heck are you!?!?'...Ok I probably didn't say heck but you know what I mean. Oh come on, you know you have those moments where you feel like God is watching you drown and waiting until the last minute to throw you a life saver. But hearing Pastor Steven sing over and over "I know that You are for me. I know that You are for me. I know that you will never forsake me in my weakness. And I know that you have come down, even if to write upon my heart, to remind me of who you are" just broke me. I needed it. I needed that sweet moment with God to let Him remind me who He is and He is for me. They then began to sing "How He loves" and changed the words after singing a few choruses "I love you, Oh how I love you, Oh how I love you, Oh how I love you"....so sweet. Apostle Ron then gets on the stage and is standing there. I know that look. He's about to mess up my world. He tells Steven to sing "Wrap me in your arms" and the dam breaks. Tears flowing, God's presence just fills my house and it's just God and I as he wraps me in His arms. Having a God who loves and cares so much about every intricate detail of my life, who will meet me in my living room to remind me He knows and He's there, is beyond words. And He was just waiting on me. I tend to build and build and build up stress trying to be strong and take care of things and God being the gentle creator He is will patiently watch and wait for me to break so he can pick up the pieces and restore me back to peace. Sigh....my knight in shinning armor :) Apostle then shares the scripture that God laid on his heart during worship that had Him in tears, Psalm 107:4-7. It hit home. Oh man did it hit home: 4 Some wandered in desert wastelands, finding no way to a city where they could settle. 5 They were hungry and thirsty, and their lives ebbed away. 6 Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. 7 He led them by a straight way to a city where they could settle Some key things in how it stuck out to me: 1. Wandering around wastelands. I feel as if I am and have been just wandering around life trying to find my way to a place where I can settle in a career, home, city, etc. 2. Their lives ebbed away. Because of this wondering my life has decreased in so many areas. We're not in a place of settling which makes it difficult to take root and grow. However, this isn't the place for us to take root and grow either. How can a tree bear fruit if planted in the desert? 3. He delievered them. His grace is sufficient. This part leaves me speechless because He heard their cries, my cries, and He is always there to deliever. 4. He led them by a straight way to a city where they could settle. I see where God is leading us to that straight way that will lead to the place we will settle. Praise God that this isn't it for us! Praise God He has a plan and purpose for our lives!! You may be scratching your head wondering what in the world I'm talking about or you may be shouting at the screen (Brandy), but I wrote this blog for me. As a reminder that when the desert gets unbearable and is ebbing away at my life to cry out to God for help and he'll deliever me and then lead me on a path that is not going to decrease my life but lead to a place where I can finally walk in his calling and plan for my life. Jesus, you simply amaze me.